I was with a narcissist for 18 years and the relationship ended 4 1/2 years ago. The smear campaign was a shock to me. People I had full on conversations with, stopped making eye contact and no longer said hello. I never spoke to his mom again after the day of separation and only a few of his family members reached out once. My kids are excluded from most of his family events but he brings his new girlfriend.
The worst part of a narcissist not caring about their kids is the financial abuse. Us three going without so many things and my ex literally traveled the world. He sent them videos and photos and told them it was my fault we were poor. He insinuated that I was wasting money and should have stayed. It was because he wasn’t pay child support.